Comparing yourself to others
“Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.” ~ Regina Brett
Have you let this quote sink in yet? Think about how often we compare ourselves to others. Social media and our capitalist, individualistic, and cut-throat society certainly perpetuate this tendency in my opinion. How often do we focus on other people in place of attending to what is right in front of us? I would argue that many of these “things” in front of our eyes are gifts that we may take for granted. Maybe you’re wishing you had that nicer car or bigger house or more stable paycheck like your neighbor or colleague or boss. I can’t fault anyone for thinking those things. I’ve certainly compared myself to others and wished I had what someone else had! However, if we go deeper, what do you think is the real purpose or reason for comparing yourself to others? How does this serve you? Most of the time, I would argue this tendency to compare yourself to others is detrimental and a waste of time because it distracts you from the present moment. It directs your attention away from what’s most important: the things or “gifts” right in front of you: maybe it’s your pet cat, or partner, close friend, your children, or trustworthy colleagues at work, living near a park or lake, or your love for and skill to play a sport or enjoy a hobby.
The 2nd sentence in this quote, “You have no idea what their journey is all about,” sheds light on our tendency to make assumptions about other people’s lives. We oftentimes think those with the nicer car, house, family, job, etc are happy and “living the dream.” Do you have all the evidence confirming this other person is happy? Do you see everything that happens in their home, within their relationships, at work, and better yet, the thoughts and feelings they have in their brain? I would think not. Frankly, you’re wasting time assuming you know how someone else’s life and journey are going. As Dr Steven Hayes, PhD said (and titled a really good book), “Get out of your head and into your life.” I challenge you take those words to heart and catch yourself when you compare your life to someone else’s. Unless you have concrete evidence about what happens in their brain and daily life, shift focus back towards your life, count your blessings, soak in the very “gifts” in front of you, and move forward.
